BACK IN STOCK: These cute cat self defense keychains are not toys, but are in fact a very serious defense weapon.

And don’t forget to use coupon code ‘SHIPFREE’ to get FREE SHIPPING on any domestic order today! Hurry and order now!

let’s play a game called “if I bought this, how many times would I stab myself?”

Actually, not many at all.

I bought one of these to put my grandmother’s mind at ease when I moved to the city, and it’s actually useful in a lot of ways. It’s easier to grab my keys in a hurry with one big thing. It’s easier to tell my keys apart from other keyrings in my house. And of course, it helps me feel safe if I feel really threatened.

But the thing is, these are just plastic! They’re not filed to a very sharp point, I can easily have my keys in my back pocket and sit on a train for an hour. No problem whatsoever. Their practicality comes from how they’re actually used. When you have your fingers in the eyes - first of all, it’s a lot more secure feeling than just having a key between your fingers. But secondly, if you drive in the ears like a punch, that amount of pressure suddenly makes the points of the ears very sharp indeed. When I poke them against my palm I’m not hurt, but I can feel exactly how hurt I would be if I weren’t just prodding them. 

And this is why i’m way more fond of the idea of a plastic defense cat than I am of a metal one.

(Note: these are technically illegal in Massachusetts, because any form of brass knuckles is illegal in MA and these are considered brass knuckles. But a cop will never confiscate these from a college girl downtown, ever.)